Customer to barman
" Honky have you any crisps? "
" Yeah "
" What have you? "
" Salt and Vinegar, Cheese and Onion "
" Have you any Bacon Fries or Honky Dories? "
" Ah hold on a minute till I get a pen and paper then I'll take your order "
" Yeah and don't forget your apron "
" Now what would you like sir?
" Have you any Steak and Onion?
" What!!, the last time you saw a steak was in a Vampire movie, a wooden one!!
Laughter in the bar.
Michael " The Sheriff " Sheils.